Meet the Parents: the real influencers in sport

I recently attended the track and field junior nationals with my son. It was a terrific showcase of young talent: records were broken and the usual state rivalry was palpable.

There were many, many parents present. Some were very much part of the entourage, carrying hammer throw, kit, spikes and energy smoothies. Others were waiting patiently at the marshalling area, ready to send good fortune vibes to their young athlete as they went into the arena, and many were in the grandstand or positioned on the hill for the spectacle.

It made me think about the importance and role of parents in sport.

What feels like a lifetime of grassroots sports, supporting kids in many school and club activities, has certainly illuminated for me the types of sporting parents, from volunteer coaches, umpires, committee members and managers, to the ‘white line fever’ hecklers who seem to transform from perfectly normal people into overly aggressive or abusive ogres. Then there are the social crew, who sit in the ultimate sports spectator chairs, binoculars and snacks ready for a good day out, chatting through the match while watching.  

It is now well established that all these parent behaviours influence children’s sports participation. Parents are key influencers of the choice of their children’s sport, their enjoyment of it, continuing with the sport and developing through the sport. Parents are actually a key to our next generation’s health and wellbeing.

 

Research has established that for parents to optimise developmental sport outcomes in their children, they need to develop knowledge and adopt a range of self-awareness, interpersonal and organisational skills to support their child. For example, different emotional demands need management during competition, such as empathy when children experience disappointment. Parents need to adapt by shifting roles through children’s athlete development stages. Significant time and financial commitments are also required, including balancing familial, social and work tensions. Ensuring fair attention is devoted to other siblings, particularly non-sporty siblings can be challenging, and has been regularly cited as a key stressor among parents.

Shifting cultural norms and the privileging of sport

It is no surprise that parental investment of time and money in children’s sport has escalated over the past 20 years. Family culture and socialisation, led by parents, have been shown to have a key influence over an individual’s sports participation over their lifetime and intergenerationally.

Middle-class parents encourage their children into more extra-curricular activities than less advantaged parents, with children of middle-class parents involved in at least two organised sport activities outside school from a young age. Parents prioritise organised sport over free play due to perceived physical, emotional, social and cognitive benefits.

As a parent of several kids involved in sport over the years, I know the prohibitive cost of organised sport and travel, particularly as kids develop into higher levels. For example, the nationals required interstate flights and accommodation, in addition to a new state uniform. That’s not easy for many families to afford, particularly those from low socio-economic backgrounds and remote or regional areas. I wonder how many talented kids are not present at nationals who should be.

The professionalisation of youth sports and parents behaving badly

 

While many parents serve a positive role in encouraging their kids in sports, misguided parental support and behaviours has led to the ‘professionalisation’ of youth sports. Winning at all costs, perpetual training, commitment to one sport at the exclusion of sampling many sports, and pursuit of future scholarships have all underpinned this phenomenon. These behaviours have also been driven by the decline in free play, overprotection of children and overscheduling. Many parents acknowledge this hurried life and reminisce about their own childhoods devoid of overscheduling, burnout and sport specialisation. In the US, for example, there have been reports of parents spending up to $20,000 per child on elite clubs, private coaches and travel. Meanwhile, 70 percent of all referees across all sports quit their role within three years, because of parental abuse from the sidelines. 

Positive parents

The benefits of organised sport include learning life skills, values, belonging to a peer group, independent thinking, resilience, relaxation and better engagement with education. Sport can teach lessons of fairness, respect, inclusion, work ethic, humility and the value of teamwork.

So, that makes it even more disappointing to hear of negative parental behaviours in sport. Coaches and sports administrators have reported more frequent negative interactions with parents than positive interactions, and also negative parent-child behaviours. These include verbal abuse, over-involvement or no involvement, coaching interference, obsession with winning and selection, and support conditional upon performance. These impacts have prompted national sporting organisations to implement parental education approaches highlighting positive parenting behaviours.

But there are also model parents who deserve a medal for serenity and affection throughout the sporting experience, irrespective of performance outcomes. Such parents who attend, encourage, and foster autonomy and accountability in their sporting offspring are shown to help drive enjoyment, confidence and continued participation in sport.

The reality is that parents are the pillars of grassroots sport, as well as key influencers of their child’s development through sport. They are the volunteers, the logistics keepers and the fundraisers. They are very much a part of our economic and social health, and our talent pipeline in sport. The majority of parents exhibit the right behaviours, balancing support and  involvement without pressurising.

There are many pathways to elite sport and development through sport, but one of the best ways is a relaxed parent who is there to guide and support, rather than coerce.

 

Thanks to all the sporting Mums and Dads for supporting your children, celebrating the wins and the losses, the selections and non-selections, the injuries and training, and all of those lifts and sausage sizzles. And for those who don’t have mums and dads willing or able to give this support, let’s work as a community to ensure frictionless pathways for young participation and talent, wherever they may reside. Let’s keep ensuring the future of sport is in good hands.

About the Author

Professor Sarah Kelly, renowned for her global academic, leadership and governance expertise across education and sports management, drives forward-thinking initiatives to the world stage. A distinguished ‘prac-academic’, commercial lawyer and champion for inclusivity, Sarah leads with innovation and insight. For exclusive updates on the latest in sport, management, leadership, education, innovation, and research, subscribe at DrSarahKelly.com.au